Living Authentic, or Something Trendy Like That...
I was inspired by Allie the other day, and her post on "Why I blog" . I was taking one of my long walks and had to keep stopping to jot down little inspiration notes.
I have blogged for what feels like forever. It started with Myspace and Xanga... (if you don't know what those are, consider yourself blessed?) and continued on with Blogger and Wordpress. I've gone through seasons where I posted regularly, times when I haven't blogged for months at a time. Bouts where I was trying to be super professional and post all my photos and network, times where I was attempting to be a fashion blogger, and times of being exhausted and not knowing how or what to blog.
But consistently, I have always strived to post an authentic version of myself. To be straight forward and honest. Over time, I've definitely developed necessary filters. Way back when, on Xanga, I'm sure I over shared all over the place- and no one needs that. But as an introvert with a LOT of thoughts, a lot of opinions and a lot of creativity, blogging has been my way to process and connect with people. I have had so many neat interactions with people over the years. I have met people who tell me they follow my blog, and people I'll never meet who have left me amazing and encouraging comments.
I strive to be real. Always. Sure- I want my blog to be visually appealing, but the words and emotions I convey are mine. I've never pretended to have it all together. I try to be honest about where I am in life. To share battles and challenges, but also to celebrate and excite when things are beautiful. Many of you have followed me through good times and bad, some of you may have picked up with me as I traveled the world on the grand adventure God had me on last year... some of you are still sticking around as I flounder a bit and try to find my footing where I am at this moment.
So, just to be straight-forward with everyone... I'm home right now. I'm living in Ohio. Currently I am blessed to be able to stay with my parents as I figure some of my next steps. While the past year of traveling and serving with YWAM was amazing and life-changing and even sort of impressive, this current season is a constant waiting game. I am doing my best to listen for God, to see what He has for me. I am job searching and applying. I am reconnecting with old and new friends. Sometimes, I am just trying to pass time without allowing myself to get depressed or defeated. Other times I spend the day with lovely people and I KNOW why I am still in Dayton.
I am a mixed up mess of a woman who has so many possibilities and so many beautiful people supporting her. I am waiting, waiting, waiting. And honestly, I'm not very good at it. I'm impatient and ungrateful and sometimes find myself feeling entitled and bratty. But I hope you all feel welcome to follow me as I (attempt) to trust God and see where He has me in the coming days, weeks and months. (Lets not talk years just yet.)
I have plans to keep busy, to keep taking photos, to do what I can to be ready whenever the time comes... for whatever it is that's next. Its scary, and exciting and I'll probably cry and whine way more than I should... but that's life right now. Honest.